And Our Winner Is…

UmbrellaBring_Up_The_BodiesThe_Garden_Of_Evening_Mists

The_LighthouseNarcopolisSwimming_Home

The reviews have all been completed.

The scores have all been tallied.

The winner by a wide margin is…

Will Self’s Umbrella!  Will couldn’t be here tonight to accept the award, but thankfully he put five seconds of effort into sending a mutton lancer wearing trainers over to deliver a speech on his behalf:

“Fuck readers!  Don’t need’em!”

Wait, what?  Sorry folks, it seems like there’s been some confusion.  I’ve just been informed that apparently we don’t play this like golf and the winner is actually the book that received the HIGHEST combined score, not the lowest.  Shall we try this again?

The reviews have all been completed.

Eh, this feels anticlimactic now, doesn’t it?  I mean we’ve already bollixed this once…

Before we announce the winner then, let’s take a look at our individual picks for who we’d each like to see take home the prize:

Aaron: Swimming Home
Elizabeth: Swimming Home
Jackie: The Garden of Evening Mists
Karli: Bring Up the Bodies
Mike: The Lighthouse
Michelle: Bring Up the Bodies
Penny: The Garden of Evening Mists

And our overall winner, the novel that compiled the highest rating total…

What now?

YES, I know they could have just clicked on the “Short List Standings” tab above.  Your guess is as good as mine as to why they’re still reading this!

With a combined score of 25.50 points out of a possible 30.00…

Hilary Mantel’s Bring Up the Bodies!

Fans of the pronoun “he,” missionary sex, torture, the Catholic church, and beheadings rejoice!

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